THEY CALL ME THE BANANA HAMMER

What can I say? Seriously, is there a limit as to how much vulgarity and stupidity I can spew? My name is Zach. I was once intelligent, but then I met the internet and it was a star-crossed-lover-kinda-shit-thing yo.

doffy:

I really genuinely like this site and it’s original layout and premise. I like custom themes. I like mobile themes. I like how posting works. I like how tag search works. I like sending and receiving asks. I like how you can make your blog whatever the hell you want. I like this fucking platform and for some reason staff is vigorously sawing their limbs off like they have to but they’re in the middle of a grocery store and everyone there is going “why the hell are you doing that?” and staff cries “you all want me to”

liberalsarecool:

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Use tax dollars to feed children/students who, by law, have to attend schools.

literallyaflame:

how do conservatives think talking to children works? if a four year old came up to me and said “i’m a cat!!” i would say “really? what makes you a cat?” and they’d say some shit like “i have claws >:)” and i’d be like “oh wow, you do have claws. but wait, i thought cats had pointed ears!” and they’d say “they DO!!!” and then i’d pull up a picture of an elf and ask “is THIS a cat?” and they’d yell “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO”

u wouldn’t say “fucking hell, Emily, get it together. this is the real world”

sergle:

this tweet is making me choke to death

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plaguedocboi:

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Wait, beneath the sea floor?

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OUGHGH??

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OIUOHGHHVOIH!!!!!

zagreus:

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cackling at this, can NOT believe it’s a real, actual quote. it reads so much like one of those clickhole pieces

meteorherd:

saw someone refer to not knowing how to keep track of your money as “girl math” ……why are we in this weird era of treating women like idiots but repackaging it to sound cute and quirky. We All Need To Stop

cybergrindr:

can we get a shoutout to trans girls who don’t wear makeup